‘It takes only seven seconds for us to judge another person when we first meet them,’ says Linda Blair, clinical psychologist and author of “Straight Talking”. ‘It’s not a conscious process, so we don’t even realize we’re doing it.’ I actually think that seven seconds is a generous statement, when you are firing on full cylinders. I think it’s more like three seconds.

Your last job interview, date, meeting of the in-laws, client meeting…did you pass the three to seven second test?

Author William Least Heat Moon asked himself  “How many people would I meet if I lived to age 90? ” Meeting for him was defined as “a face-to-face exchange containing a clear, if momentary, recognition ”. Each person could only count once towards the total.

In his case, the total that he came up with (and he was being generous) was 100,000. Take that number, give or take a couple thousand based on your personal everyday habits and there’s your number. That’s a lot of possibility.

Have you ever met someone who massively and beneficially changed the course of your life? What if when you met this person you were having a bad day and didn’t pass the three to seven second test that you didn’t even know you were being graded on?

Tweet: Imagine that the next person you meet holds huge opportunity for you, opportunity that you may not even imagine yet. @erinkellygirl

If this were the case wouldn’t you want to present the best you to that person?

That’s all well and good in theory you might say, but there are days where you just don’t feel like your best self. You are frustrated by the clothes you are wearing, the fact that you didn’t get a good nights sleep or that your spouse, roommate or child really pissed you off as you were walking out the door.

The good news is that you don’t actually have to be feeling your best self to present your best self. The three to seven second test is judged mostly on your body language and that is something you can fake.

Amy Cuddy has a great TED Talk where she talks about faking body language to both better your chances of making a smashing effect in the first three to seven seconds. On top of that, a nice side perk of this technique is that faking it may also improve your inner feelings as well. Watch it here

Here are my 5 tips to “Fakin’ it” that might also actually make you feel like you are makin’ it.

1. Body posture – put your body into a position of a person who knows everything and is about to conquer the world.
2. Smile – Even if you don’t feel like you can. (If this one is hard for you, hold a pen lengthwise between your teeth, this forces your lips up in a smile).
3. React with enthusiasm – no matter what silly thing comes out of the mouth of the person(s) you are interacting with crank up your enthusiasm: “Oh my gosh! That’s AMAZING!”
4. Ask positive questions, stay curious, use sentences that start with: “Tell me more…”, “How do you feel when…”, “What is that like…”, “Yes, and…”
5. Find what you are grateful for in the other, or in the situation. Feel it and name it.

Try it and tell me if you make it!

E